R/L: When Fantasy Meets Reality – making it work!

[I started this several months ago and am finishing it off now and posting it. I also want to say, I talk a lot about the do-ability of a spanking over a lap on a chair in this post, and I got to do a fair amount of this recently, and have to say…it actually worked quite well. Physically demanding, yes, but it worked better than I expected!]

For many of us, (us being spankos) we have a core fantasy that has been present in our minds since childhood. Sometimes it’s a recurring scenario or a specific tone, headspace, or implement. I’ve already written about my primary core fantasy, as a fiction, and a bit in general. Early on it was a very parental, disciplinary style spanking with a hand and hairbrush, though I’ve always struggled to identify the reason for the spanking. Likely because I never really did anything in my childhood that would have realistically earned something like that – I am not being coy, I was terrified of being in trouble! The best I can come up with is perhaps losing my temper or procrastination (funny enough, still relevant). Once I was older, I wrapped my head around the concept of it just being good for me, but that took a while. There are a few others – bending over a bed/couch arm/chair in jeans for the belt, a hard hand spanking at bedtime in pajamas, and more.

What I have been thinking a lot about for a while, is when those fantasies, especially those closely held and for a long time, have a chance to become reality. Can any fantasy truly become reality? Are they translatable? I think a feeling, or tone, definitely can be. The logistics can sometimes be tricky. Wanting to feel small, not in control, seen, a little embarrassed – with the right person, the right level of trust, and the opportunity, these feel very possible. Unsupported OTK on a chair for a spanking that I physically fight a bit in which I end up limp and crying? Far less likely. Can I go over a lap on a chair? Yes, and reasonably comfortably, too! Unsupported OTK of the variety that is often fantasized about with feet dangling and hands on the floor (or also dangling!) can be really hard on the upper body. I’m not 18 anymore and I am not a small person! Even for someone younger or smaller, it can be a lot on the upper body/back. With some people, it wouldn’t physically be possible with my body type, but it is doable.

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Fiction: Like a Naughty Girl

When I first started blogging and joining online spanking spaces, it was specifically to read, write, and share, spanking fiction. I was young and inexperienced so I am not saying it was good fiction, but there it was. Until a few months ago, I hadn’t written much about spanking or kink for years – part of that was being absorbed in school and part is because although I love to write, I find it very difficult to arrange what I’d like to write. Writing a research paper for school involved a lot of reading, note taking, and thinking before I would sit down and often write thousands of words in a single evening. This is probably the product of a bit of undiagnosed ADHD, but I’ve always worked well under the pressure of a deadline or some sort of external structure. Internal structure exists, but it’s more complicated for me. So writing spanking stories is similar – I spend a lot of time thinking of a scenario or story and it doesn’t get written down until it feels like it’s positively going to explode from my finger tips. Sometimes that’s at 4am and sometimes it’s in the middle of my work day. This one was written in the Notes app on my phone, as I groggily lay awake before my husband and daughter roused in the bed next to me.

Anyway, I’ve been dabbling back in fiction a bit and wrote down one of my most common and recurring spanking dreams. I have had this dream – or a variation of it – for as long as I can remember. It is the absolute core of my kink: a hard OTK hairbrushing that I don’t want, but is good for me, and is not about it being my choice – in fact, it’s better if I don’t want it. Now, this particular variation is heavily influenced by recent discussions and negotiations for potential real life play, and a lot of conversations about those earliest and most core fantasies. The uniform is a more recent addition to these dreams/fantasies so this variation is quite new to me.

It also explores a concept I intend to write about more and that is the concept of being an inherently good girl and not wanting to misbehave simply to get spanked hard. Hence the title.

I hope you enjoy it.

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