Oops. Everyone needs a break, right? I didn’t intend to take a break from blogging for June, but it just sort of happened. I started two other blogs after I posted my May Book Round Up – one about bratting (and why I don’t like it – ha!) and one about my first spanking ever, because June 21 was the 20th anniversary of my first “adult” spanking, meaning a spanking from someone who shared my fetish. When I posted this on Fetlife and in a Discord I am in, it occurred to me, some folks who are married to vanilla’s may never get spanked by someone who shares their fetish, and my categorization could feel alienating. That is not my intention. I think perhaps “first spanking with my fetish in mind” would fit better, but it also happened to be with someone who shared it, so that’s an important designation for me. I’m not going to share the details in this post, but I will finish that one and get it posted ASAP.
Continue reading “Summer Break!”Tag: writing
The May Book Round Up
Ahh May – a slower month for reading but I read all available in one series (more to come) and a rather large tomb at the end, so I feel good about it all. There was a lot of rain this month and a lot of distracting myself, so I’ve also played a lot of video games (Disney Dreamlight Valley, if you’re curious) while listening to these. All of these were audio except for This is Pleasure and Bad Behavior, though the latter is included in the Audible Plus library, if you’re curious, and I think Gaitskill’s reading of “Secretary” is excellent (though found her difficult as a reader of other stories in the collection).
Continue reading “The May Book Round Up”How I Want to *Feel*
When I talk about spanking and discipline specifically, I often talk about how I want to feel vs what I want, physically. Yes, the hairbrush, uniform, and the ritual and all the other stuff is important, but ultimately the goal is to achieve a specific feeling. One of being seen and held and cared for – and not just physically, but emotionally as well. This is definitely an oversimplification and the folks I’ve talked about play with get the deeper dive, but I digress. In my recent deep-dive into classic spanking fiction, I was reminded of Larrkin, who was known for his LOTR M/M spanking AU. Much of this wasn’t my thing back in the day to be honest, but is now. Also, I use past-tense not because I know anything you don’t, but because Larrkin hasn’t updated his website or blog in a few years and may not be known by many who read my blog. That said, his stories are still easily accessible.
On his intro page for new readers, he talks a bit about building his AU and why and what it means to him. I know this quote of his has floated around the spanking community for many years so I am not sharing anything groundbreaking, but I think a lot of especially newer spankos probably haven’t seen it. These are words that speak to me, make me feel seen. They just make sense and when I read it, I think “yes, exactly like that”. A few pieces of writing have engendered this feeling in me – several of my favorite stories of course, but also some I have saved on my hard drive that are only archived in the Wayback Machine. But when I think of how I want to feel when it comes to discipline, maintenance, and the like, Larrkin’s words capture it beautifully.
A spanking is not meant to diminish. It is meant to nourish. The unspoken message conveyed to anyone over my knee, hobbit, elf, or man is, ‘I care about you. I am not indifferent to your need, your guilt, your loneliness. I will not walk away. You will not be passed over or ignored. I see you, and I care enough to discipline you.’
It’s a loving act, a trust, and a bond. Indeed, who among us does not suffer the worst anguish possible when our pain goes unheeded, or worse yet, when it is seen, yet dismissed? And who does not need a little attention sometimes simply because they do?
Nourish, care, not being indifferent to need, guilt, or loneliness; how one might feel when these needs are seen, yet dismissed. The acknowledgment that spanking can meet the need to have our pain noticed and handled with care by someone who cares. And perhaps especially that last line, who does not need a little attention sometimes simply because they do?
Who could say it better than that?
-M