Category: Musings

In My Head

I promise, I haven’t abandoned this, even though I am not sure there’s anyone really here reading (jk, I know there are folks reading!). I am trying to remind myself that not every post has to be a perfect treatise on a given topic. It’s not like I am not thinking about spanking – I am, constantly, it feels like. Frankly, I feel 15 again with how at the forefront of my mind spanking is. But also, I missed this part of myself for so many years and I am glad it’s back. It doesn’t feel all-consuming, just…there. There in a way it hadn’t been for a while. There in a way that I feel like a more complete version of myself. I’m not thinking about it because I miss it and everything it brought to my life but rather because it feels like an integrated part of my being again. I know who this Marie is.

And this Marie is thinking a lot about what has become one of my favorite types of spankings over the years. When I began playing at 18 (well, we’ll go with that publicly) it was a lot of hand spanking and trying any/every thing. I was pretty open to experimentation, but I did always love hand spanking. Those early years when I was living in NYC and attending Paddles OTK nights (and MSA and SSNY parties) regularly, I was playing primarily with one person (whom I am lucky enough to still call a friend) and leather became the name of the game. The thing about leather, for me, is that I can generally take a lot of it. It was also the first way I was able to access submission.

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Safe words & Discipline: how do they work?

Recently on a Discord server I am a member of, the QOTD was about safe words, how people use them, when people use them, etc. and the topic of safe words during discipline/punishment came up fairly quickly. I don’t think there was a single person who said safe words weren’t appropriate even for “real life” punishments/discipline, including me. However, I had a slightly different take than some others, because of how I do discipline. These days, I am not playing casually with anyone really, even at the few parties I am going to, but I wouldn’t hesitate to safe word if a spanking/implement/whatever, didn’t work for me. I also rarely do real-life punishments and when I do, it’s primarily from me, so I haven’t had reason to stop it. But would I safe word with a trusted, well-negotiated play partner?

Yes, but not how you might think.

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Lines as Affirmation

This is a piece I wrote to explain my headspace around line writing (in October 2023), so I’ve lightly edited it to make it “public” facing, but it’s something I think about often, since lines (and essays!) are a significant component of the real-but-not-real-life discipline I’ve done. Lines are not unheard of in the spanking community, but the person I have written lines for, has expectations for them. Expectations that make the act itself structure and discipline, not simply busy work – though they could theoretically also be used as a consequence, I don’t have experience with that (yet!). This was written after the first time I wrote some lines on my own and in a much less formal situation, but before the first time I wrote lines for real, which was pretty cool and came a few weeks later.

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